Lori Nita Larsen

Lori Nita Larsen (September 17, 1956 – May 1, 2025) sold jewelry for 42 years, not because she loved jewelry or cared about advancing in her career, but because she loved people and savored the chance to help elevate some of the most special moments in their lives. When her son, Sean, was born in 1982 and her daughter, Ashley, in 1985, her life changed, and she never looked back. Her true vocation was nurturing her relationships with the people she loved, especially her husband, Jim, their children, and later, their grandsons, Miles and George.

James Baldwin once said, “The world is held together, really it is held together, by the love and the passion of a very few people.” Lori was one of them. Warm, radiant, and energetic, her beauty shone through her kindness, humor, and authenticity. She had an unforgettable smile and a magnetic, joyful presence. Everyone who knew her was struck by her sparkling personality—a rare combination of warmth, authenticity, humor, and raw charisma.

Lori’s love was spacious and kind. You could trust her, because she wanted you to be yourself, and because she disarmed you with her unapologetic authenticity. She was incapable of putting on a front, and those who knew her best would say the more you knew her, the better she got. To meet her was to make a fast friend. She found something to like about everyone she encountered. Her love made others feel seen, safe, and known. She prioritized relationships, worked through conflicts, forgave quickly, apologized easily, and cared deeply—especially for those on the margins. She refused to hold grudges. She died how she lived: at peace with all the people in her life. Her love was so spacious that in the end, it enveloped her. All that was left for her was the presence, affection, and care of the people who made up her world, and whom she loved warmly until the end.

Her ability to give herself in a way that made you more yourself is probably why her children grew into her friends. They spoke to her nearly every day of their adult lives, and she always took their calls. She delighted in them, reminded them often of her love and pride, and showed it even more consistently. There was no gap between what she said and how she lived.

You could always count on Lori for honesty, for presence, and for love. She filled life with lightness and laughter. She loved the beach, bike rides, veranda dining, dogs, day trips, Rocky Road ice cream, chocolate persian donuts, and her husband’s hamburgers. She wrote heartfelt cards (filling the front and back with her distinctive handwriting), cleaned when she was stressed, and had absolutely no sense of direction. Lori was usually late, rarely made dessert, and never took herself too seriously. Some of her kids’ best memories involved laughing at her silliness or her malapropisms until their sides hurt. She could talk endlessly to anyone—an infant, a stranger, a young child, someone with advanced dementia. She spent a great deal of time with her beloved grandsons, Miles and George. They were her best friends, and she was theirs. In her final months, she developed a special relationship with her caregiver, Shannon Rubenzer, whose joyful, kind, and loving competence helped make life more bearable for her and for Jim.

Lori and Jim were inseparable partners for nearly 45 years. They teased each other, joked a lot, cared for each other, and loved with faithful devotion. As Lori’s illness progressed, Jim was determined to care for her the way she would have cared for him—attentively, patiently, affectionately, tenderly, and with good humor. It was excruciating to watch her decline, but they found a way to keep having fun together. They couldn’t make it better, so together they made it beautiful.

Lori’s faith in Jesus was the foundation of her life. Her kids woke up to her praying at the kitchen table. She began her prayers, “Dear Heavenly Father,” and she always asked for both “wisdom and discernment.” Her faith was honest and evolving. She was not afraid to ask difficult questions, to live without having all the answers, and to change her mind when she needed to. She cared deeply for people. As she grew, she discovered how her proud, unambiguous support for the LGBTQ people she loved paired with her evangelical spirituality. She worked to live her faith in every part of her life. She struggled with what the demands of love and justice meant for how she engaged with social and political issues—believing that this ongoing struggle was the truest way to follow Jesus. Like every other part of her life, her faith was characterized by honesty, integrity, and authenticity. Her shelves were filled with marked-up Bibles and prayer journals. Her love for Jesus touched, animated, elevated, and transfigured every part of her life. Through that love, her faith lives on in her kids, her husband, and her grandkids. She was exactly the kind of person who shouldn’t die at 68 years old and exactly the kind of person whose openness to God made her open both to life and to death. Her whole life had become a prayer, and her death her final self-offering. We eagerly wait for an answer to that prayer.

Lori was preceded in death by her beloved mother, Renee Grace Caldwell; her brother, Mark (Diane) Caldwell; her biological father, Bruce Bienfang; her in-laws, Tom (Clarence) and Mary Larsen; her sister-in-law, Kathy Link; and her niece, Jodi Link. She was joined in death by her brother, Brian (Michelle) Bienfang on May 5. She is survived by her husband, James Craig Larsen; her son, Sean Craig Larsen (Cory Bretsch); her daughter, Ashley Renee (Steven) Bode; her grandsons, Miles and George Bode; her sister, Wendi (John) Curran; her adopted father, Thomas (Le) Caldwell; her unofficially adopted sister, Annie (Mike) Tanner; and numerous in-laws, nieces, nephews, great-nieces and nephews, and dear friends.

A memorial gathering will be held on May 16, 2025 from 1:00-2:30PM at Elmbrook Church (777 S. Barker Rd., Brookfield, WI 53045). Memorial service to follow at 2:30PM. A link to stream the service online will be available for those unable at attend in person. A dinner reception will be held immediately following the service at The Starling (102 N. Water St., Milwaukee, WI 53202).

Gifts in Lori’s name can be made to World Vision or James Place, both of which were close to Lori’s heart.